20 Unbeetable Turnip Jokes!
These root-vegetable jokes are turnip-ing up the laughter!
Did you know that turnips used to be the vegetable used in the UK to make jack-o'-lanterns? It's true! While they may not be the scariest vegetable any more, they might just be the funniest! Read on for some truly hilarious turnip jokes - and if you're left hungry for more, we've got plenty of freshly-picked food humour! Try our jokes about limes, toast, and Halloween food - truly good enough to eat!
You thought no one was going to tell any vegetable jokes…
But then I turnip!
What did one turnip say to the other before his big exam?
“We’re all rooting for you!”
What do you call a highwayman who only steals root vegetables?
Dick Turnip!
What’s the best way to deal with turnip cravings?
A vegetable patch!
I asked the waitress what was in the club salad…
She said, “Lettuce, turnip, the beet!”
Why do root vegetables have a reputation for being snobbish?
They always turnip their noses!
I just planted some root vegetables in my garden…
We’ll see what turnips!
What’s a farmer’s favourite kind of jeans?
Ones with turnips!
Why couldn’t the baby turnip go to the party?
Because he was still grounded!
How did the vegan rock band open up their show?
“Lettuce turnip the beet!”
What nationality are turnips?
Swede-ish!
I just saw a man in the local bookshop exchanging a root vegetable for the complete works of Dickens…
Now that’s what I call a turnip for the books!
Where do turnips go to unwind after work?
The Salad Bar!
How do farmers party?
They turnip the volume!
“Doctor doctor, I have a turnip stuck up my nose! What do I do?”
“Well, I suggest eating more sensibly!”
My sister thinks that onions are the only vegetable that can make you cry…
Clearly she’s never been hit in the face by a turnip before!
What’s the difference between turnips and bogeys?
Children will actually eat their bogeys!
What kind of socks do you need to plant turnips?
Garden hose!
Why are root vegetables such good DJs?
They really know how to turnip the beet!
I can’t find my vegetables…
I hope they turnip soon!
