I am Muriel Brown, wife to the mayor Wilbur and mother of my son, Walter. You may have seen me walking around Beanotown’s best shops wearing only the finest garments. My car may have tooted its horn at you. Not to say hello, but to say that you’re in my way! It’s likely that I’m driving Walter to school or to a wonderful boutique to purchase him something as a reward for being a wonderful son, a good student or to calm him down after confronting Dennis for his menacing ways. 

I’m surprised Walter has just one friend – a student named Bertie Blenkinsop – as he’s so kind, caring and lovely. Perhaps people feel they can’t measure up to the standards he’s set for himself and would perhaps find themselves in the shadow of how wonderful he is. It’s very understandable. 

My husband is very busy and extremely ambitious. He’s Beanotown’s most powerful person and should be treated as such. Remember to vote Brown at the next elections!

The Browns also have a beautiful cat named Clawdia. She’s a pedigree cat, who is always beautifully groomed and has perfect manners. Which is more than can be said for the Menace’s family dog, Gnasher. And the whole family, come to think of it.

But a word of advice, should Claudia visit your home – it is worth considering getting only the finest food for her. Fresh salmon is a must! I demand nothing but the best for her. And beware, if you annoy Clawdia – if you attempt to pet her once she’s had a meal, for example – her claws will come out! Give her what she requires, and allow her to exit your home whenever she wishes. 

I must go now, I have important things to attend to.

Muriel Brown Fact File

Name: Muriel Brown

Age: It’s impolite to ask someone’s age

Birthday: The perfect excuse to have an enormous party, to which the Menaces are NOT welcome

Best friend: Wilbur and Walter

Worst enemy: People who get in my way

Prized possessions: My collection of jewellery

Motto: ‘Walter is a wonderful son’

Super skill: Overlooking Walter’s sometimes obnoxious behaviour

Family: Her husband Wilbur Brown, son Walter and pet cat Clawdia

Address: Tranquillity, 53 Gasworks Road

Fact: My husband Wilbur is Beanotown’s greatest mayor and should be Prime Minister!