20 Milk Jokes You Won't Skim Over!
These dairy-based jokes haven't been milked to death yet, so come in and pour yourself a glass of laughter!
Don't worry if you're lactose intolerant - these milk jokes are suitable for everyone! Get ready for some serious giggles - and if you're drinking milk while you read it, it might just come out of your nose! Don't forget to check out the rest of our jokes when you're done - we've got loads! How about some smoothie jokes? Or ketchup jokes? We've even got some tea jokes!
Did you hear about the milk company CEO who was arrested for embezzlement?
Turns out he was skimming some off the top!
Did I ever tell you about the time I stole some milk that someone had left by their window?
It was ledge-end dairy!
Why does milk turn into yoghurt when you take it to a museum?
It becomes cultured!
Did you know that cows produce more milk when farmers talk to them?
It’s a case of “in one ear, and out of the udder!”
What do you call the greatest milk ever made?
Legendairy!
What kind of milk is used to make Swiss cheese?
Hole milk!
I love drinking 2% milk, but I always wonder…
What happened to the other 98%?
What sound does a cow make when it runs out of milk?
None… there’s udder silence!
Where does condensed milk come from?
Very small cows!
Astronaut 1: “I can’t find any milk for my coffee!”
Astronaut 2: “In space, no one can. Here, use cream.”
Why does a milking stool only have three legs?
Because the cow has the udder!
What comes first, cereal or milk?
Neither – it should be bowl first!
What do you call milk that gets given everything it wants?
Spoiled!
Which baseball player holds the milk?
The pitcher!
Why did the skimmed milk fail the test?
He only got 1%!
What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a cow?
A hare in your milk!
What do you get when you cross a duck and a cow?
Milk and quackers!
Cashier: “Would you like your milk in a bag, sir?”
Customer: “No, I’ll keep it in the bottle, thanks!”
What do you call a cow that’s stopped producing milk?
A milk dud!
Did you know that milk is the fastest liquid on the planet?
It’s pasteurized before you know it!
What happens when cows laugh?
Milk comes out of their noses!
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