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20 Pear-fect Pear Jokes!

Have a squeeze on these 20 hilarious pear puns and punchlines! These thin-skinned fruity funnies are guaranteed to be your jam!

Pears are juicy, soft, and have a window of about 2 minutes before they go all squishy! But something you might not know about pears - is that they're really funny, too! We thought we'd prove it by collecting 20 of the very best pear puns! Have a look for yourself!

If you want more fruity laughs, check out these banana jokes, these lemon jokes, or even these pineapple jokes! Jokes aplenty!

Ok, let's get pre-pear-ed (geddit?) for these 20 awesome pear jokes!

My friend handed me a peach. I told him I prefer pears

So he handed me another one!

Where do you take your pear tree when it runs out of pears?

The re-pear shop!

Fruit Jokes
Fruit Jokes

What happens when an apple and a pear are hybridized?

It makes a new fruit appear!

An apple being picked from the tree

What do you call a pear thats a dad?

I don't really know but it should be apparent!

What do you call it when fruit are a bad influence on each other?

Pear pressure!

How did the pear get into an easy group at the Olympics?

Because it was well seeded!

Why was the pear by himself?

Because the banana split!

Why did the pear stop?

He ran out of juice!

Fruit smoothies

What’s worse than finding a worm in your pear?

Finding half a worm in your pear!

What do Noah and a tin can have in common?

They both preserve pears!

Why didn’t the pear and the banana get married?

Because fruit cantaloupe!

Went to the shop today to buy some pears, lemons and apples, but they didn’t have any

It was a fruitless trip!

I tried growing genetically modified apples

But it's gone pear shaped!

A lorry load of pears has crashed on the motorway

It’s caused a huge jam!

Why did the pear go out with a prune?

Because he couldn’t find a date!

What do you call two pears?

A pair!

Why didn’t the apple maggot board Noah’s ark?

They'd heard everyone was going in pears!

What do you call a vanishing fruit?

A disap-pear!

Which fruit leaves money for the teeth they find?

The tooth pear-ie!

What is a prickly pear?

Two hedgehogs!