20 Super-Flexible Stretching Jokes!
These supremely silly stretching jokes will have you bending over backwards in laughter!
Stretching is important for you to stay healthy and limber - but it's also important to keep yourself laughing! These incredibly supple jokes will have you doubling over with laughter - touching your toes, in fact! And don't forget to try our other jokes when you're done! If you want to stay stretchy, we've got jokes about ballet, yoga, and knees!
I was going to make a joke about flexibility…
But it was too much of a stretch!
What did the tomato say at yoga class?
“I’m so flexible, I can stretch from my head to-ma-toes!”
Why do shellfish need to stretch regularly?
To get stronger mussels!
Why do demons need to stretch regularly?
They need to exorcise!
How does a T-rex feel after stretching?
A bit dino-sore!
It’s been ten years since I last bit my nails…
Once I hit forty, I couldn’t stretch my mouth to my toenails any more!
What did the stretch band say when it robbed the bank?
“Nobody move, this is a rubbery!”
What did the newspapers call it when a billionaire got involved in a rubber band scandal?
Elongate!
What’s the best way to stretch your food budget?
Cut a minute steak into sixty pieces. Now everyone can have seconds!
If you see a man stretched out across your yard, how do you know which country he’s from?
It’s easy – he’s a SpanYard!
I’ve been doing yoga for twenty years…
It’s been a long stretch!
What do you call it when you stretch a fork to see if it breaks?
Testing its utensil strength!
I went into a shop that stretched letters for you…
It had really long queues!
Why did the tree stretch?
So it could be timber!
My yoga instructor asked me if I could touch my toes…
I said, well that’s a bit of a stretch!
Can a Toyota stretch?
No, but a Mercedes Benz!
What do you call a stretched billionaire?
Elongated!
Did you hear about the man who was arrested for stealing yoga DVDs?
He’s doing a long stretch!
People say exercising every day will change your life…
I say that’s a bit of a stretch!
My pilates instructor asked me, “How flexible are you?”
I said, “Well, I can’t do Mondays or Thursdays!”
Want More Gags?
Check Out the Great Joke Generator!
