20 Fast-Paced Marathon Jokes!
Grab your water bottles and make sure your laces are tied - we're warming up for some serious laughs with these marathon jokes!
Everyone make sure to stretch - these jokes are a marathon, not a sprint! While running 42km doesn't sound hilarious, trust us - you'll be in stitches with laughter by the end of these jokes! And don't forget, we've got more sporty laughs for you when you're done - try some jokes about gymnastics, bicycles, and basketball!
I forgot my first marathon joke…
I need something to jog my memory!
Did you hear about the man who finished the marathon in under an hour?
He was Russian!
Why did the programmer drop out of the marathon?
She had a runtime error!
Why should you eat McDonald’s before a marathon?
You’ve gotta have some fast food!
How did the lawyer with the leg injury still manage to win the marathon?
He had the power of a torn knee!
Did you hear about the marathon runner who was afraid of speed bumps on the road?
He’s slowly getting over it!
Did you hear about the Spanish man who ran the marathon?
He Juan!
What happened to the woman who forgot her water bottle at the marathon?
She finished 3st!
Why are snowmen so bad at marathons?
They just can’t warm up!
I don’t finish marathons because I’m lucky…
I finish because I’m driven!
Why should you never mess with a marathoner?
They run the streets!
I think my nose is training for a marathon…
It’s been running all morning!
What do you call it when a stand-up comedian has a lot of bits about marathons in his set?
A running joke!
Did you hear about the marathon runner who did the race barefoot?
She suffered the agony of de-feet!
How do you know if someone runs marathons?
Don’t worry, they’ll tell you!
Where does the Helsinki Marathon end?
At the Finnish line!
Why was the DJ disqualified from the marathon?
He kept changing tracks!
What’s the best time to run a marathon?
Lent, because then you fast!
Why did the marathon runner end up in jail?
For resisting a rest!
Training for a marathon is very hard work…
But it’s worth it in the long run!
