20 Monk Jokes To Break Your Vow Of Silence!
These monasterial jokes will have you giggling in the abbey!
Need some jokes to meditate over? These hilariously holy jokes are so funny, you won't be able to concentrate! Bow your head and enjoy these jokes - laughter guaranteed! Don't forget to check out some of our other jokes too - why not howl with laughter at some werewolf jokes, or
How is a meditating monk like a fibre-optic cable?
Total internal reflection!
What did the head monk say to the monk who was leaving the monastery?
"You're friared!"
What do you call a Franciscan monk with wings?
An air friar!
Why are monks so good at protesting?
The more ohms you get, the greater the resistance!
I always wanted to be a Gregorian monk…
But I never got the chants!
What do you call an electric monk?
Enlightening!
I was out camping in the woods when a monk tried to sell me flowers, and I said no thanks…
I do my bit to prevent florist friars!
What did the Tibetan monk say when he saw the face of Jesus in his toast?
“I can’t believe it’s not Buddha!”
A Zen monk told me, “Do the opposite of what I tell you.”
So I didn't!
What happens when a Buddhist monk gets way too into his D&D campaign?
He enters Nerdvana!
Are monks allowed to send emails?
Yes, as long as there are no attachments!
Monk 1, flipping TV channels: “There’s nothing on!”
Monk 2: “Excellent, let’s watch that!”
Why did the Buddhist coroner lose his job?
He kept listing the cause of death as “birth”!
Why was the monk so careful when he left his garage?
So his karma wouldn’t run over his dogma!
What is a Buddhist monk’s favourite Disney film?
Fro-Zen!
What did the cashier say when the monk asked for his change?
“Change comes from within!”
How many Buddhist monks does it take to change a lightbulb?
There is only one!
Why can’t monks vacuum the corners of the room?
Because they have no attachments!
What do monks order at the bagel shop?
One with everything!
What do you call a monk who fries potatoes?
A chipmunk!
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