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Beano Comic

Nemo Jokes

Finding Nemo’s an offishially awesome film filled with very finny fish based jokes, but we think our jokes are finny too. If bad puns are your gillty pleasure, be warned – this page of jokes is filled with mackereally bad puns!

Of all the animated films about fish that are looking for something, FInding Nemo is our total favourite. We have other favourite films though. Check out our Epic Disney Character Silhouette Quiz or maybe our What Marvel Agents Of Shield Character Are You? Maybe you’re ready to tackle our mega 50 question movie quiz

Dory was caught by some stilton cheese bait…

Hook, line and stinker!

Why was Nemo’s Dad cross?

Because his grades were below sea level!

How does Pearl go into battle?

Well armed!

What does Nemo’s Dad read him at bedtime?

A Dorybook!

After Nemo, what was the animators favourite fish?

A cartoona fish!

What did the shark say after eating a clown fish?

 This tastes a little funny

What kind of fish does Dory see at night?

Starfish!

Where does Dory sleep?

On the sea bed!

What did Dory order from McDonald's?

The Big MacKerel!

What’s the fastest speed at which Sheldon the Seahorse can swim?

At a scallop!

What does Nemo’s Dad give Nemo to stay healthy ?

Vitamin Sea!

Why doesn’t Nemo like the song Baby Shark?

It’s too catchy!

Why did Nemo go to jail?

He had no fin to hide but was still found gillty!

Why are Pearl the Octopus’ arms called tentacles when…

There are only 8 of them!?

How many tickles from Nemo does it take to make Pearl the Octopus laugh?

Ten-tickles!

Why was Nemo disgusted?

Because the sea weed!

Why doesn’t Nemo like practising cricket?

He’s scared of nets!

Where do goldfish love to travel?

Usually just around the globe!

Who does Nemo call when his piano breaks?

A tuna fish!

What did Nemo say when he swam into a wall? 

Dam!

What do you call clown fish with no eyes?

Clown Fsh!